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The day when I was going to show my film to the professors in my university, I was stressed. There were about 40 or 50 people in the screening room and I always feel weird when I watch my work with the audience. After the screening, when I got up in front of everybody, there was an uncomfortable silence for about a minute. Than people started to yell about how bad the film was. I just coulnd't say anything. And I worked hard not to cry there.
I was feeling very bad but I just had to find a way to get over it. After 3 days of screening, I was going to start to work in a feature film as an assistant director which I was waiting eagerly, I was invited there by my professor which I had a great relationship in the school, I wasn't going to get paid but I really liked the director and I was looking forward to it. At the same time, I got an e-mail from the film school that I applied two months before saying that they were interested in my portfolio but wanted to know more about me and I made a schedule with them on the day of my birthday, 2nd of july, for the interview. I had 2 weeks before that day.
People I started to work with on the feature were really mean to me. I think this is something that I will never understand for the rest of my life because I don't know why they acted this way. My professor too, was very hard on me and I just didn't know what to do. I was trying to be positive all the time but everything I said or did was wrong for them. I was already feeling very bad because of my graduation film and this was very hard for me. Every time, I thought about quitting, I said to myself not to give up and every time I wanted to speak to my professor, he never had time for me and everytime I wanted to ask him about something, he would yell at me for no reason. I mean why?
The day before the interview, I told them that I was going to have an interview tomorrow, we had to go to Beykoz for the production, than at some point, I would go back to my house to get online on skype. Tomorrow morning, when I was at Beykoz, my brother who was staying with me called me that there were calling me on skype from the school. I couldn't believe it. I always thought it was going to be in the afternoon but not in the morning. I was working so hard that I just couldn't realize it was going to be in the morning. I called the school, they gave me 15 minutes!! From Beykoz to Sisli?! I arrived home in 45 minutes but it was already too late. I missed the interview with Brian Tufano and I missed my chance. And it was my birthday. And for a very long time, I really felt like a loser. I still do.
OK, what happened to Mr. MacLean? And no, this is not any old silly-assed question, just in case you were wondering.
YanıtlaSilForget the fatso Cihangir actors and all the rest of that cabal! I know exactly what you mean, but FORGET THEM ANYWAY!!! And you wanna know why? Because they are predictably boring whereas YOU are not!
Instead, tell me about Mr. MacLean: Make up 5 different stories with 5 completely different flows, endings or no endings - up to you. But completely different from one another! Like totally!!! Get as absurd as you like. If you want to they can be realistic but if not go crazy. He can switch careers and become an astronaut, then go to Mars and fall madly in love with a little green Martian for all I care. Or go into organic farming and produce the biggest organic patlıcan ever!
Go go go!
i hope you will give a speech for TED. but before that day please watch alain de botton's video over and over. Meritocracy is an illusiuon, especially in developing countries like ours:)
YanıtlaSiland last word:
don't believe hollywood but don't live without it either.